Ever since I started dating, I noticed that I was always attracted to the guys who played hard to get, by treating me as if they could not care less about me or even to the extreme that I did not exist in their world. For days on end, I would drive myself nearly insane with my plotting and planning little teasers and tricks that I could do for one of these guys, in order to get him to not simply notice me, but to have him wanting me to be his so badly in the end, that he would wind up being the one going nuts by chasing after me! lol And I’ll be darned, I usually always had my way with him, in winning him over to fall head over heels for me. I would be madly in love with that guy for just barely about two weeks, when I would tire of his sweetness and being ‘too nice’ to me. Then I would dump him flatter than a pancake on a hot, greasy griddle, and move on to my next challenge.
But, if by chance, one of those bad boys was able to resist every one and all of my wily charms by barely giving me the time of day, I would keep on trying to get him to notice me, just so that I could then ask him out on a date. And if I was able to convince him to at least LIKE me enough to start seeing me on a regular basis, I would keep falling deeper and deeper into what I thought was ‘in love’ with him, while he would continue to treat me like some poor little pesky turd that had somehow gotten stuck on the sole of his shoe! lol
Yep, there is no doubt about it! I have always been one of those gals who never seemed to be able to help herself when it came to falling for a BAD BOY! You know exactly the type guy I am referring to — the men who play all the head games by treating the women they are supposed to care about with total disrespect and disregard. It seems as if they get some sort of sick pleasure out of hurting their gals feelings and making them squirm, by constantly keeping themselves just emotionally distant enough to never let a lady get near their true heart and soul. Yep, that’s the kind of guy I mean — I have always called them BAD BOYS.
I have never been quite sure what the big deal about getting their attention turned toward me was all about. I suspect that — very much like our male counterparts — the thrill of the hunt is in the chase, and once you’ve bagged your prey, you simply want to pack up your stuff and go home! lol But the truth of the matter is that bad boys are bad news for any gal who has the misfortune of getting into a relationship with one of them, since the only thing you have to look forward to is being hurt and in pain from the emotional abuse they are constantly pouring upon you. I also tend to think that being attracted to just that type of BAD BOY can become an addiction for some women, especially if you are young and immature when you first encounter that kind of guy.
When I was in my early twenties, much of it was simply a game to me, just to see which bad boys I could reel in, in order to wrap them around my little pinky finger for a while, toy with them, and then dispose of them when I was finished figuring out what made them tick. On a few occasions, I would actually go after a guy for one or more years in my efforts to possess him and get him to be mine, even though I never kept any of them around for very long. And the badder and badder the bad boy would treat me, the harder I would fall for him, until finally one day he would do something so absolutely and awfully rotten to me, that my heart would be broken into a million little pieces, and I would turn and sulk away like a hurt puppy dog with her tail between her legs!
It did not become apparent to me until sometime late in my twenties, how my constantly going after the ones who treated me so badly was actually a big problem. I felt like I was somehow a magnet for creeps, in that the only guys I ever wound up in any kind of a ‘relationship’ with were the BAD BOYS — and baby, they were attracted to me, it seemed, like a bunch of flies are attracted to some rotting, stinking, cattle carcass that’s been lying in the desert sun for a good long day or two! Yech! The problem being that I was never able to develop any kind of a decent or steady long-term relationship with any man by then, since my loving them consisted mainly of getting hurt and being in pain for the majority of the time that I spent with them. Rarely did I feel any kind of loving or caring for me on their part, consequently finding myself in a continual state of being emotionally abused by every single man I was ever involved with. And believe you me, if you have never been in that kind of abusive relationship, cruel and harsh words constantly coming from the lips of the man you love can cut into your heart as deep as a 12” carving knife! It does a hell of a lot of damage to your own self-esteem, and you can easily loose track of your real, inner self, by believing that all the horrible things they say about you are true.
Then something changed in me, as I matured into my thirties and even forties, and was — by then — absolutely and totally fed up with men in general. I had lumped each and every one of them into the category of CREEP, thinking that there was no such thing left in this world as a nice and decent guy. Yet, thanks to and because of my own dear Dad, who was really a great guy in every single way possible, I knew that there had to be one like him somewhere out there. However, being emotionally exhausted from my searching for him, I figured I would wait patiently and try to play my cards right, to see if perhaps the Man Upstairs had dealt an ace or maybe even two into my hand! hehehe
Patience paid off in my case, even though I had to wait until I was 51 years old to find one of those NICE guys, when I met a 38-year old man right here on the Internet and started seeing him on a regular basis. And altho he is a married guy, and has a life outside of and away from me, I am perfectly content to leave him to his family when he needs to be there, simply because he makes it well worth my while to be good to him. Because he treats me like a queen, with nary a nasty word to ever be spoken, and he lavishes me with compliments, and praise, and appreciation for the lady that I am to him, speaking always and only in endearing, loving terms and showering me with a gentle, genuine affection that makes me feel simply FABULOUS! If he has a temper, he sure hides it well, since I have never seen even a flash of heat coming from him, except when it is well-warranted and only directed toward someone or something other than me. He tells me I’m the sexiest thing he’s ever laid his eyes on, and he throws in ‘the most beautiful, too!’, and he tells me I’m sweet, and soft, and kind, and generous, and loving — and he tells me often enough to make me believe that I really am all of those things to him. Not to mention, our sex life is simply fantastic — always exciting, always new, always getting better and always leaving me wanting him more. He makes love to me like no other man can, because when he touches me, it comes from his loving heart and soul, leaving me shivering up my spine and quivering all over long after our love making session is through.
Being the perpetually single lady that I am, I still do date other guys now and then. I have even taken on a new lover here and there, because it can get lonely on the weekends and holidays when you love a married guy. I no longer lust after BAD BOYS like I used to do, and the guys I see now know pretty much how to treat a lady right. Yet none can quite match or measure up to the ways that the one nicest guy I know makes me feel — loved and appreciated and even adored, simply for doing nothing other than to always be myself! And believe me when I tell you this: I plan to hang on to him for as long as he’ll have me, and I will never trade his kindness and gentleness, nor his loving, caring nature for any other guy that may come into my life.
It would not surprise me in the least to learn that it was, in fact, a bad boy who originally coined the phrase, ”NICE GUYS FINISH LAST” just to try and throw some unsuspecting ladies off the track! lol Because as far as this lady is now concerned, when it comes to BAD BOYS and me, well… I will say this to all you guys out there, whomever you are and whatever type or kind you may be: Sure as shootin’, sooner or later, we all do get our comeuppance in life, our just desserts, and whatever else it is that we so deserve to receive. And if you’ve been a BAD BOY, when the shit hits the fan — it will all be your own, it will splat you in your face, and you’ll be left to sit and stew in a huge pile of stinking poop for a good long while to come. hehehe